Burnout
Yes, I'm finally on medical leave after so long. Not sure if it's a good thing or bad thing, but I think it's time I slow down abit and maybe let my body rest.
R showed me an article just yesterday about signs of a burnout at work. After reading it, I was sure that was me!
Yes..Burnout!Drained!Pushed to the limit!Whateva!
I wouldn't have realised if not for R, I'd probably think I was just going through an extremely long PMS period. Anyway, I finally made the decision to MC and let my body rest and recover today.*satisfied smiley* Just a pity that the doctor did not offer to give me 2 days instead of 1. Damn!
Talking about my doctor's trip makes my blood boil! Why? Here's the story...
Doctor: Hi, what can I do for you?
Me:Erhm...not feeling too well today. (while sniffing my nose)Headache and nausea. Been having insomnia too...( I was still ranting when she cut me short)
Doctor: Oh, and block nose?Does your throat hurt?(somehow she sensed my nose block thingy cos of my nasal voice)
Me: Oh yes (actually I suspected that my sniffing nose was more of my sinus problem then anything else, but I went along anyway =p) My throat feels dry too.
Doctor: Ok (while performing a bad attempt to look at my throat-she just shone the light into my mouth...and trying to hear my lungs or whatever just placing the sethoscope for like 1 second behind my back!)
Doctor: Okay, drink more water and rest well. Need MC today?
Me: Ya..(still abit bewildered as to what she was tempting to do)And that was it! Everything took less than 5 mins when I had to wait like 15 mins in a EMPTY clinic. I was wondering what the 2 doctors were doing making me wait that long! And the whole consultation took less than a minute! Damn the doctors nowadays make easy money!
I was upset because I thought the doc wasn't being very professional about it all. She wasn't exactly concerned about my well-being or anything. I would not have chosen this clinic if it wasn't part of my company listed company. Else I would have to fork out my own medical fees. It's like she is only entertaining me because she thought I simply needed a MC and that the rest was really none of her business. What happened to professionalism and ethics? She gave me a whole lot of medicine which I did not ask for. So she knew the tab was on my company so she gave all the funny medicine that I did not ask for. Lame rite?
Having said that, my nose is still running, perhaps I did get the flu bug...Haizz..BUMMER day...
Had a ridiculous arguement with R today...I shall not mention. Crappy day!*sobz*
Lazy!
As I am trying to blog here, I can’t help but wondering if my colleagues are doing something similar (anything that deviates from work) as well. It’s like, we have about 20 odd manpower in this entire department, but is everyone doing work at this specific moment?
Honestly, can anyone work 8 hours straight and not being distracted? At all? Possible?
I do know that at times you are just too busy trying to get things done, it is only then that the clock seems to go doubly fast and you can’t seem to catch hold of time, even a minute.
As I try to glance though, I realized that since our seating positions are practically ‘naked’, we can easily see what each of us are doing, pretty much without effort. Perhaps that’s the ultimate motive of our bosses. They have a nice comfy room where they have all the privacy needed, while we, lie stark naked and exposed!
Back to where I was, some people seemed to be really busy and really occupied, while some, hee…u can distinctly peep over their shoulders to see them surfing the net.
It’s not a crime really, I mean…I can’t say much because I am also guilty of skiving (blogging during work hours!) Ha..well..we all need a break somehow, don’t we? =p
I’m really tired now so I thought perhaps blogging can give my brain some exercise so that it wouldn’t fall asleep. The project is drawing near, a part of me is looking forward to it, purely because it adds another “pretty” item to my resume…heehee…brings my market price up you see….a woman’s gotta eat and shop you know…so $$ is not a must but necessary to survive! Muahahahahaha =D
Anywayz, another part of me loathe it because I have been assigned a lot of the mundane and tedious work and not forgetting…the 2 hr traveling time from home to the client’s site! For 2 months(at least) I’d have to endure all these…I can’t help but wondering if all these are gonna be worthwhile after all. But I guess only time can tell….
Nothing too drama to bitch today really….Life’s getting too damn boring!
Sleepy Monday
Another Monday.
Had a really short night again last night. For some weird reasons, Mr Zhou Gong din want to visit me and so Miss Insomnia came for a chat instead. It was a long night, I was really tired but Miss Insomnia insisted on staying and so…I had to obliged and thus earned only a few hours of shut eyes when Miss Insomnia decided to leave closer to dawn. But before I could really slipped into a comfortable rest…My alarm rang…
And so…another tired working Monday!
I’m really tired today with a tad of swollen eyes and extreme fatigue. Bummer day!
Luckily for me the day will be over in another 2 hours, well that is assuming I can leave on time…
My eye lids are really feeling damn heavy right now….if only there’s a sick bay or something like those in schools…Hee…hmm..but then again..Maybe not..you never know exactly who slept on the bed before…yikes! Well..just a thought anyway…
I hope things will go well today so that I can potentially leave on time. So tire……*yawnz*….d…so…sleee…*yawnz* ..py….
I hope I can sleep well tonight.
Wanted to recap on my weekend…but I could hardly squeeze the ever so little left brain juice out…perhaps another time…
Till then…ZzzZzzzZzzzz…
Boredom!
I am bored! Really damn blardy bored. Sigh, why dun the clock just tick faster to 5.30 and I can go home!!! *grumbles*
I’m really really not in the mood for work today…no idea why.
Conclusion: I need a break to recharge!!!
Any sponsers? LoL *big grin* my bdae is coming….LoL. So BHB…but then again..hardly anyone reads my blog anyway? =p.
I entitled to dream right,no? =D
Just somethin'
I’m not exactly feeling too well today.
It’s one of those days when my head feels abit heavy and it is a sure sign of a pending headache anytime soon…Bummer!
I dread such feeling really. Been having frequent headaches lately, I guess it’s cos of work creeping up and not to mention my stress level.
We were at an initial meeting yesterday at customer’s site @ Bukit Batok. Bummer! Why can’t we have projects closer to my home! Blardy tired to travel to and fro like that you know. And I’m the only ONE who stays that far anyway. The rest of my team stays like 10 mins away or mostly just half an hour. Crappo!
Anyway I’m really kinda bored now. Not that I’ve got nothing to do but I’m seriously bored doing it! I just keep procrastinating, this maybe because I seriously don’t enjoy what I have been assigned lately. I feel like a “care-le-fair”, (read literally) simply meant extra! This term is usually used to describe those extras who act in dramas who have no role in anything but simply to make up the crowd. Some lucky ones might have some lamer lines to read, else you’re just there to walk around in front of the camera. So…..I feel exactly like an extra these days. No major roles, or maybe not even roles, just there to do whatever that is left or needed or simply cos there’s no one else doing it kind.
Anyway that aside. I’ve been visiting more and more blogs lately. Simply because some of the usual blogs that I follow have somehow turned dry/boring/predictable and so ever attention seeking that I feel it’s more of a pretence thing now to keep the whole image and popularity going. Lame!
So as I go though random links between bloggers, I realized that there are actually really good writers out there in Singapore! I mean good as in they have a really special touch when describing how their life is. It’s almost like reading a novel except it’s real!
Who ever said Singaporeans have no good writers, always speak Singlish and can never converse intellectually? I truly beg to differ since…
Sometimes when I wish to go beyond my own current mundane life, I look forward to reading other people’s recollection of what’s been happening in their lives…Interestingly, some of these blogs do contain very personal details, even to the extend of sex. The truth is, I don’t find them offensive or anything, I mean, it’s their blog isn’t it? But it’s the way they portray their lives in words that makes it interesting….It’s nice to “live” outside your life sometimes. It lets you dream…..=D
You see, the choice of words when you write is very important. It’s like saying ‘nincompoop’ to someone when you really meant ‘stupid’, or to say ‘go away’ when you really meant ‘get lost’. Each word/vocab has a unique way of defining the degree of intention. It’s like saying ‘I like you’ to someone on your first 3 dates so as to not scare away him/her. And ‘I love you’ to him/her again when you are in a committed relationship sort. ‘I like you’ will not be appropriate anymore.
I must confess that I’m not a good writer at all. My English is failing me and everything that comes out of me now is pretty much SAP related. It’s like talking in SAP terms! *shudders* It sucks! I know. Job hazard! *sulks*
I think I’m a much better conversationist anytime compared to a writer. Ha! I just complain too much! =p
Cohabitation?
I read an article in “Today” yesterday which made me rather pissed off knowing that such an extreme MCP still existed.
Quoting the man…” Is it time for the concept of marriage to be done away with, and be replaced with a contract where both parties negotiate the terms of their cohabitation? Even to the extent where each party may have an allowable number of affairs a year? “
If you are interested in the whole article, Here’s the link.
http://www.todayonline.com/articles/68201.asp
ps: Although I’m in IT line, I’m really quite bad with html and stuffs, so pardon me. =p
The reason why I’m so roused by this article was because to Mr MCP, marriage seemed so casual, so meaningless, so pointless. I thought that was mindless and childish. He goes on talking about how difficult it is for men to “curb his natural need to keep sowing his seed.” What bullshit! If he is so keen in sowing his seeds, why don’t he become a gigglo or something? You get to sow your seed AND you get paid! How “exciting” is that? But then again, he might not fit THE criteria? Shessh…I’m really appalled as to how shallow Mr MCP is.
In response to his ridiculously self-centric article, some readers responded saying…”… what differentiates us as human beings over animals is our ability to exercise choice, and the intelligence to accept responsibility for that choice.” I applaud a few gracious gentlemen who responded very eloquently explaining the differences between animals and us. In fact, animals like dolphins and XX do mate for life as well. So what is Mr MCP trying to imply? He probably belong to some wild Africa nature park or something where he can roam freely and “sow” freely too…Geezz…Lame!
If you are interested to read the responses…
http://www.todayonline.com/articles/68434.asp
Marriage is not able just being together, having sex, having children and wait to die. Marriage is more than that. Marriage is about trust, commitment, understanding, responsibilities and doing things together and sharing wonderful memories of being in love and together. And it is only mature people who feel they can cope with these that they get married. Our dear Mr MCP here obviously is not mature enough to think so nor mature enough! How sad! He’s more likely a self- conceited prick who thinks nothing but himself? *Humpf*
In my opinion, he should probably be gang raped by some big fat African women or something. In the meantime he probably can sow and spread his seeds across cultures and nations. Doing Singapore a good service! Hurhurhur….(I’m mean!)
But honestly, marriage is really a gamble in life. You’d never know for sure if he/she is THE one. But does cohabitation really solve this issue here? I mean, there’s always a good and bad side to things. But if I ever want to cohabit with someone, I don’t think my parents would ever agree! And financially, I hardly think it’s possible either! So the conclusion is……hmm….I don’t know what the conclusion is really.
Do you agree in cohabitation?
Yesterday's Post
Internet was sooo coincidently down yesterday when I tried to post my blog...BUMMER!someone out there doesn't seem to like me very much.
Anywayz, this is yesterday's post...more to come...err..later..if I find time to blog! =)
~~~~~~~~~//~~~~~~~~~~
It’s been awhile….
Lately, work is really loading up as well as my work responsibilities.
I don’t know exactly if this is a good thing because I’m starting to doubt what my role is in my company.
I would love to think that its great, not a lot of major responsibilities and able to go back on time once in awhile and ultimately, at least I’ve got A job. Compared to a lot of others out there, I’m really lucky.
But the truth is, lately I’ve been seeing a lot of signs that my existence is pretty much to cater to those who need help. It’s like I’m taking over tasks that no one else want to do. It’s quite depressing seeing it at an angle, but maybe from within all these ad hoc whatever stuffs, I might be able to learn a skill or two and improve myself.
Eventually, I’ll take alllll these skills and find somewhere else that would truly appreciate me!
I’ve had a really bad period last week…probably because too many things were all happening at once and too many disappointments. I was quite wrecked and very demoralized!
I’m slowly recovering tho.
~~~~//~~~~~
Been having a lot of serious thoughts about life lately, wondering how best should you live your life…but I realized that YOUR is the key word to living life…you have the choice as to how you want your life to be like. No one can take that away nor can they dictate how you should live your life. It’s yours…Live it!
I know I’m not making a lot of sense here having jumbling all my thoughts into one dough. But the truth is, its hard to just sit here in a limited timeframe and hoping you can spill everything out in writings. Just like what I’m doing right now…there are times when I just can’t filter my thoughts out to best express myself…
Maybe I should get myself a PDA? Or pocket pc? hahaha…then I might be able to write down my thoughts in a proper manner. Expensive gadget there I know…I’ve never really fancied those techy stuffs…so..haha..dun bother!
I’ve been looking through my calendar, seems that my schedule is so tight all the way till Christmas. Bummer! I don’t even know if I can properly enjoy my birthday. It’s so near the project kick off…And the worse is, my aussie trip that I’ve been so looking forward to also have to be shelved till next year. Haizz…Well, on the bright side, I get more time to save up. =)
I’m really quite tired right now, my brain juiced are allllll drained. Been so occupied the whole day. Looking forward to knocking off now…I need to give my brain some rest before I’ll get another headache…
Yawnzz……
Complains....again!
Pardon me..Need to complain again!
Been feeling really down lately.
It’s like so many things happening altogether at once….and unfortunately…they aren’t good ones.
A new project is coming real soon and I was all excited because I thought I was going to have a bigger role this time round. But it turned out, I was going to do all the “dirty” work again.
It’s really tough having to always endure doing shit when you are a noob. People trample on you like you are some worthless chap in the corner and finds your worthiness when they need some shit to be cleared. It really sucks.
When I requested to attend another session of training to increase my knowledge and hopefully my ultimate independence…..I was rejected flat! Reason being, my boss thought that I did not have enough business knowledge as yet. Her advice? I was to involve myself more in the user support side, talk more to the users, and when I’m ready, I’ll be able to go for the training.
Hmm…but I always thought it’s the other way round, undergo training first, and when users gather to discuss any issues or requirements, I would then be able to say yes, possible, or simply no, not possible. Seems that I’m wrong?
R had a theory. He felt that there was a conspiracy behind my rejection to go for training….
You see, my company policy states that if they were to send you for training courses that costs over S$1000, they will need to bond you for a year. Having already gone for a previous training course that cost S$1500, I was already bonded a year since my course started. But if I were to sign up for another similar course, my bond will be concurrent, meaning my bond will start from a year again since my next course. So in R’s theory, my company will lugi – aka lose out. Because they sent me to 2 different courses but I get to be bonded for only more than a year…..How sad right if that’s really true. Come to think of it, they didn’t even need to pay for my previous course because they had some accumulated points thingy that they could just deduct from. Lame…I do feel abit cheated upon signing the bond…Darn!
I actually felt that the previous project gave me a lot of insight into business processes, how businesses are carried out and why. On top of that, the training gave me even more insight into SAP and it made me more confident when handling problems and troubleshooting. That’s why I felt that going for more training would make me more efficient when handling issues. Sadly, my boss does not think so….
The truth is...(I have my own theories as well) I think that my boss somehow don’t want me to proceed too fast in learning all the possible skills because in my module, there’s still my mentor who is capable of doing everything and she is not going anywhere. So I think my best position right now is to do whatever that is expected of me. Some shit job nobody wants to do…ME! So tedious work nobody wants to do…ME! Some work that nobody knows who should do it…ME! Call me the garang guni ger or wahever…that’s what I have been expected to do basically. Ironically there wasn’t in my contract nor my job scope. But…..(there’s always a but)the last clause in my job scope is to do whatever the boss expects me to! So? What to do? My boss expects me to do shit can I say no or complain? Nope! I can only complain in my blog….
I’m feeling so down and sad lately…I need a perk-me-up activity. However, I’m also saving up for my aussie trip…so basically I can’t do nothing! Spent so much on my blades already…hardly dare to spend too much. So…can’t go shopping, can’t go on expensive meals…tell me what else I can do that is cheap and yet a good perk-me-up remedy!
*sobz*
Letter...
Dear All,
I’m pleased to announce that a our department dinner will be held at:
Some Curry Restaurant, Time, Address because:
1) We have an Indian colleague
2) We have an Indian colleague who is vegetarian
3) We have ONE blardy choosy ah neh colleague who is vegetarian, Northern Indian vegetarian to be precise and will not entertain anything else!
Kindly RSVP by Wednesday so that I can make the reservations for the dinner. Would appreciate if everyone can turn up for this occasion. Thanks!
PS: If you have any comments on the venue, time or date, kindly keep your comments to yourself because:
1) You did not organize the event!
2) You did not organize the event!
3) You did not have to organize this blardy event so if you think you can do beta, pls wait till you get your chance! I’d gladly volunteer you the next round!
Thanks!I’m so tempted to send this out to everyone on the mailing list. It’s so hard trying to organize a simple dinner and hoping that everyone can be spontaneous enuff to attend and just mingle with each other. It’s so hard trying to please everyone too and you still hear comments like who “suggest to go here?”, “who suggest to go there?”, “aiyah the food there not very nice leh…blar blar” . Can’t they even wait till I’m out of the hearing range before saying all these? I’m already trying to accommodate everyone and this is what I get. And the best pressie yet, our DEAR DEAR ah neh colleague decided not to go cos he felt that the vegetarian food there would most probably suck! What a stuck up big F huh? Hoping to accommodate his shit but in the end….he can’t even compromise! And when you go around asking people to RSVP, they think their like some superstars…”I haven’t decided yet” WTF? You want free dinner then attend, don’t wan…den phark off…Give me this kind of lame answer for phark? This is the first and the last ever dinner I’m going to organize. It’s just too hard trying to please everyone! I should have suggested Macdonalds!
Apologise for the improper language. Am too pissed with everything that’s happening in the office right now. That’s the best way I could really let it all go!!!!!
AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pissed Off!
Organising a company dinner can be such a pain in the ass sometimes!
Why?
Cos there’s always gonna be some lame ass pple who think they are some Big F!!!!
Don’t they understand what it means to compromise?
If you think that everyone should do what you like, then u r a big pharking selfish brat!
I mean, come on! It’s a company dinner, nobody gets to choose what he or she likes. It’s about having more time together interacting and perhaps getting to know each other more.
Some annoying pple like to be choosy and yet so unwilling to compromise. Some, think they are some superstar and refuse to commit a “yes” or “no” to the dinner. For God’s sake…it’s just a freaking dinner! Why do u need me to pester and pester you for an answer? You enjoy me “begging” u huh?
Piece of shit!
I’ve had it to about HERE!!!!
Bad cramps and assholes do not mix well! I repeat, DO NOT MIX WELL!!!!!
So please keep at least 500km away from me if you do not wish to get yourself hurt!
Thank You Very Much!
Many things are happening to me all at once. It’s like when you’re not finished with one, the next comes creeping up...Never ending...
I’m really not sure what I am writing or blogging about anymore.
It’s like I’m just letting my fingers do the talking (not related to any yellow pages advert pls!)
But yar,,I’m serious, it’s like I’m just letting it go….so many things happening, so many emotions, so many thoughts but I hardly really know how to express it all….
The events aren’t exactly of any sort of chronological order…Just wateva that comes out of my head!
First up, we have a new girl, not really new..in the sense that she was
the intern that I wrote about in one of my previous posts.
Anyway that lucky girl, she managed to secure a perm position with my company right after graduation. Well, maybe she’s lucky, but we cannot deny the connection between her dad and our company right? Envious…I never had such opportunity.
Anyway she’s one disappointing character…Attention seeker and absolutely spoilt. Should have guessed it long ago because all rich daddy’s girls are like that! It took me only like now to realize…haizz…I guess it really takes time to get to know someone huh?
She’s actually very much like one of my friend whom I used to think was my best friend….she’s like this honey bee, all sweet and cute…traveling from flower to flower, always making an effort to make everyone like her…but she can never be a true friend, one whom when you need, never is there for you…
And with the backing of all the senior mgmt around and her new-found rich boyfriend, well I guess inevitably you tend to throw your weight around? *sigh* Humans beings are too predictable! I thought she might be different, apparently I was wrong….again! Somehow I’m a really bad judgement of character? Or I simply fall prey to sweet honey bees….Muahaha..
Men will fall prey one by one…how can you blame me for falling too? This sounds abit lesby…but no..I’m straight! =D
Sometimes you really can’t help feeling envious…I mean all these people simply get everything and anything they want. It’s like they probably never really worry about not getting something or having to scrap and save for something that you really want. They simply get it…LIKE THAT! They never understand the feeling of hoping and wanting something but knowing its beyond reach…at least for now…
It’s like, which person do not enjoy indulging in luxury stuffs? I do not yearn for it…but if I could, the question is…y not? Of course, this is then the angel and devil issue again. It’s subjective… but let’s stop and think for a moment…Is this what you really really want? *shrugs*
Men is never satisfied is it? When you have one, you want 2,3 and more. It’s never enough. So when you have the money and the power to, will you stop and think of the poor kids down the road or some poor friend who could not even afford a puny pager while you always have the latest Nokia phone?
I’ve never really considered myself to be a spendthrift, in fact cultivated since young, I’ve always been taught that material things are superficial. Although I’d have to admit that like any young ignorant teen, I too had harbored for material, branded, expensive etc stuffs as well. But thanks to my parents, I was never given the opportunity to do so. With every item that I yearn for, I had to earn it. Either by scoring well, or…scrap and save for it. Nothing that I had was easily gained!
Now that I’ve started working, I’ve been nice to myself once in awhile, treating myself to some “treats” once awhile. Not any branded stuffs or anything, just simple things like clothes and shoes. I also spend selectively! *grins*
But the truth is, although I am stingy to myself, if I had some extra money, I’m never ever stingy to the ones I love… I would choose to spend on them then myself…It’s true…so..I’m hoping that someone can splurge on me? Muahahaha *big grin*
*beams* I do feel better after complaining!
Damn…my right arm hurts… thanks to the blardy fall last Sun, from my shoulders to my forearm and it is swelling slightly. I hope I did not fracture it. Hurts even when I’m typing man…if this pain does not subside weekend, I’m going to the doctor’s. Haiz…Bad week!
Sucky Monday
My boss is back…no more “freedom”. More work to do, which aren’t exactly within my job scope. *sigh*
Real bummer sometimes, but no choice. Noobs are treated such unfairly!
Well, just to update a lil on my weekend.
Hmm…let’s see..Ah Ha!
I told R I was going to blog this and I am!
We got a new pair of blades on the weekend and went blading Sun morning.
Guess what?
I FELL!!!!! Right on my right bum!!!!!
Thanks to my dear R, giving confusing “instructions” on how I should brake!
And ta dah! I fell! =(
Totally smashed my record of blading,skating,ice-skating, even cycling, without falling down!
Boy was that painful..and it still hurts mind you. Think there’s a blue black somewhere….okay..no graphical description please…I’m lame..just needed to take my mind off work. Bummer rite?
*sigh*
Just having a bad time at work again…boring..mono…and ever exploited.
I’m really really having Monday blues today for some reasons. Its like I’ve got things to do, I’ve done them but yet feeling uneasy.
While having lunch today, a colleague commented that I was being reserved, therefore I was not doing myself a great favour because I couldn’t really communicate with the senior mgmt pple, which includes my boss of course.
I’d agree to certain extend that I’m really much reserved compared to who I was a couple of years back…no..make that more than a couple of years back. I have forgotten how long it was when I was that cheeky crazy girl in school…it has really been quite awhile. *gasps* I’m getting old…Whateva,side track!
I miss those times really. Never really knew what changed me or if I wasn’t exactly myself then at all. It’s still a mystery actually….I still haven’t found myself? Perhaps…
I’ve tried asking myself what changed me? Was it because I wanted to change? Or was it really because circumstances made me change? It’s such a sticky debate. Or maybe I was just waiting for a reason to change, and when it happen, I took it without reservations.
So the question is now….Should I change back to this crazy girl style or just be me? Laid back, just doing my work and not talking much? I really don’t know…
I think I don’t know myself that much…not as much as I thot I did…
How can I return and find myself? Is there ever a way? =-( I hate being me right now!
*sobz*
Piecing my thoughts
Another rainy day…..Crazy weather it is. If it keeps going on like this, I assure you I will be sick soon.
I’ve been trying to go through my thoughts all day, trying to really find out how exactly should I “express” myself.
R made an effort to bug me to reveal what exactly was bothering me.
Quote
”You never had problems expressing yourself?”Hmm…I hesitated …and I reckon its most probably PMS that’s messing with me again…her usual monthly arrival. It is annoying and at the same time assuring…weird isn’t it?
WOMEN! Sheeshhh…
Well, after trying to calm myself a little I decided to actually try to structure things abit. Perhaps it’s easier to go from there?
Anyway let me try to piece out my thoughts…from…erhmm…Saturday!
Saturday-
Stupid GV! I’ve got 2 complimentary tickets from them as a form of apology because of some things that they did. And yes..they were SO KIND as to give me 2 complimentary tickets which arrived at my mail like 10 days after? Great customer service there huh? And that’s not all…The BLOODY tickets have so many clauses that in the end, I had to pay for my own movie instead!!!WTH!!! Complimentary tickets are meant to be complimentary, and compliments are meant to make you happy! And if you give someone some free complimentary tickets as a form of apology, you DON’T stick 101 restrictions to simply watch ONE SHOW!!!!!
IMPOSSIBLE!!!!
I was really fuming mad! Totally ridiculous! It’s says I can’t watch a movie before 5 on Saturday and I can watch movies with * on them, which incidentally cancelled out like 90% of the shows? WTH again? GV’s crap! Charge so much for a freaking movie ticket and yet can’t even give out proper complimentary tickets! #^*%^*&*^#^$^&%^%*^
It’s no wonder there’s movie piracy! Damn GV!!!!!!!
Rest of the week-
Well, the rest of the week was not too happening, just that my mum was sick and she started with abit of her usual tantrums again. I feel really upset when she does this, ignoring me and all that. As if I’ve done some preposterous thing again. It’s hard trying to please my parents while getting a life at the same time. It’s just impossible. It’s just so hard to try and please everyone! Sometimes I really do wonder what is it that makes my life so mono, so boring and so colourless. I’ve given some thought and yar…I realized that it is not that I don’t want to get a life and bring more colours to my current mundane life, it is because I simply have no time! Why? I’m too bz trying to make everyone happy. My parents, my bf, my bf’s parents and my work. Where was there enough room for myself? My friends? I’d have to sacrifice any one of the above…and the consequences? Nothing good!
It’s pathetic isn’t it! I finally found the root of my boring-ness! I’m trying too hard to please everyone that I’ve forgotten another important person…Myself!
.......
It’s really just one of the days where you have seem to have so many things to blog but u just don’t know where to start.
It’s like your thoughts are flying everywhere, anywhere, perpetually all the time as well. Bummer really! Sucks big time too!
Sigh….and I thought I was trying to relieve some of the tension in my head…
Guess I’ll have to leave it to another day perhaps? When my head’s a little clearer than its current state!
*sobz*
TGIF!
Yay!!! After a long week it’s finally Friday. So looking forward to it because the week has been rather…..erhmm….un-productive? Been quite slack lately but preparing for another project soon. Don’t exactly know my main role in that project, perhaps when my boss return, we’ll all get a better picture to moving forward.
Next week’s gonna have a public holiday! Another yay!!! It’s been like so long since we’ve had any public holidays. Let’s see..the last one that I had was…supposedly Vesak Day but because of the project, we were given an additional day to our annual leave. And the Labour day holiday? It was crap cos’ we had to travel that day. So….I’m glad I’m finally able to enjoy my next public holiday with much ghee!!! Heee…..
I’m extremely tired this afternoon. The rain has finally passed and the sun is out shining again. Had a full lunch today so I’m feeling really really drowsy right now as if I’ve just had my flu medication. *yawnz….*
Been trying to plan for my upcoming trip to Australia…yes..again! This is because I’ve just gotten my Australia PR and is given a timeframe to stamp my passport for the first entry as a PR. This trip is back to Perth again because right now it is the cheapest Aussie destination. It hasn’t been easy saving up all my money and now…it’s all back to square one again. Feeling abit sore having to spend like thousand plus of my hard earned money just like that. Sigh…so hard to earn a living nowadays…*sobz* Was hoping for a sponser…but I guess…who can/will sponser me??? I doubt any sane person would??? Hahahaha =p I still have the right to dream rite? kekeke….
Well, even knowing that this trip will put a big big hole in my pocket, I’m still looking forward to it. I need a break man. We’ll see when that will happen when I can confirm my involvement in the project and when I can take leave. Sometimes it sucks having to work. I miss school…hahahaha
Nothing much to blabber about today really. Boring day. Boring week!
I know I’ve been saying this for weeks…but I seriously need to get a life! Fast!
Revelations
I’ve been going through my usual circle of blogs and the topic of sex seems to be flying all over lately. Hmm…is it the horny period or something? Anywayz never mind that…
In all honesty, I consider myself as an extremely conservative person coming from a very traditional family and all. But, inevitably after being exposed to foreign culture in Australia for like 3 and a half years, I’ll admit that I’ve learnt to be more open-minded and more susceptive towards others opinions towards love, relationships and sex of course. But I still strongly believe that certain traditional values should be kept. Like monogamy and keeping yourself for your husband blar blar…..
I used to have this young friend I got to know in my JC years when we were in some competition. He was 4 years my junior. He was a very sweet guy really. Perhaps he had a crush or something on me then, but that was that. He’s happily attached now. =)
Well, while I was in Australia, he would write to me…yes…snail mail. Quite cute right. I mean amidst all the Internet and emails stuffs, he chose to write to me instead. It was really sweet!(Told you I was a “traditional” person.)
Anywayz, we started talking about our lives, what’s happening, what’s happy and what’s sad. He shared with me on his opinions about pre-maritial sex. And he had no qualms nor reservations to claim that he would have sex before marriage. I was taken aback with his so-called outburst and honesty. But at the same time, I felt that he was just being frank with his thoughts with me, he wasn’t trying to be all hypocrite and maybe even try to impress me or something. I accepted his honesty readily, no doubts, no bias, no prejudice and certainly no judgment. He had his rights to having his own opinions yar?
Through the years I became to see for myself that the youngsters in Singapore are actually more open-minded than I thought. I guess I was abit naïve then thinking that everyone shared my views. A friend of mine even got herself pregnant and ended up with abortion because she and her bf was just too young to take on all that responsibility. Well, they split after that, it was sad…but it happened.
It was then I realized that perhaps the world was not that innocent after all. So stories of romps in campus starting flying…it was funny initially, I never thought uni grads were so active in their “xxx-tra curriculum” activities.
People don’t regard sex as being an “exclusive” activity anymore. Perhaps to some, it’s really about screwing the more the better and perhaps gaining more experience since. Bloggers like SPG certainly have no reservations in discussing all her sex romps and her preferences in ang mohs. I applaud her honesty and her ability to open herself up to criticisms and insults but yet maintaining her own point of views. I don’t judge her because I don’t think anyone has any rights or whatsoever to judge anybody or somebody. Free of speech that is…To put it plainly, everyone’s having sex!!!!!! Somewhere, somehow!! But I guess sometimes we overlook the responsibility that comes with it.
I read a blog somewhere that a young girl was impregnated by her SAF scholar bf. But that scoundrel broke up with her (on or after her birthday I think) because he felt he was just not ready to cope with the “mess”. Mess. He used the word MESS!!! What happened to his conscious? He obviously was NOT thinking of the consequences when he was “messing” around with his girlfriend, and having a great time I suppose? How irresponsible!!!! And a bloody scholar somemore!!!! ARRRGGGHSSSS!!!!!
Aren’t they suppose to be cream of the crop with all the good virtues and qualities stuff shit? What happened to their morals and conscious? Failed moral education in school or what??????? #%*%*&^&^*&%$#%*^*&^*^&*(%$#^%^(*&()*)*
*ahem* pardon me, need to re-compose myself a lil……So anywayz, she decided to keep the baby and be a single mother. I truly applaud her for her courage. In a “conservative”(note the irony) environment in Singapore, it takes a lot of courage to be a single (stress the word)-UNWED parent. I would run and give her a big bear hug if I knew who she is right now. *sigh* I truly empathize with her and what she is going through. She’s one brave soul!
We’re all adults now, not hormone raging teenagers anymore. We should start thinking of our actions versus their consequences. Life’s not a joke!Do cherish LIFE!
Bummer....
Lazy afternoon again…
*yawnz….*
It’s a gloomy afternoon, a good time and weather for an afternoon nap. Unfortunately I am not lucky enough to enjoy this…
R and myself are meeting for dinner today. Actually it was more of an impromptu thing.
WHY?
Because my dear R just popped out of nowhere and asked me…
“ Are we meeting later? Sorry I forgot to ask you last night”My reply
“ Oh, u never ask so I assumed no lor” “ Because you said last night we are meeting on Friday?”So…the conversation went on…The truth is, sometime last week we did said something about meeting Wednesday, but because he so enthusiastically said yesterday that we are going to meet Friday but he’s gotta reach home early because he’s going to fetch his dad to the airport, and so I assumed the meeting on Wed is most probably off since he didn’t mention anything.
I usually like to plan my dates the day before because I will always inform my mum beforehand in the morning if I’m not coming back for dinner that night. I don’t exactly like just calling her out of the blue and say I’m not coming back because sometimes she would have already prepared the food for the night. Anywayz, I just don’t really like to call her mid-day and tell her I’m not coming back for dinner blar blar unless it’s really necessary.
I know…it’s me alrite!!! Remember Komplexity!!!!!
Never mind that…so the story goes…I just felt like “a lady” today and was hoping R could “convince” me out on a “date” tonite.( I know it’s lame but hey..it’s been awhile since I’ve been OFFICIALLY asked out on a date OK!!!!!) So I just felt like it you know…to feel wanted again perhaps…*bleh*
But but but….(there’s always a but) my dear Roy, as usual, simply can’t be spontaneous enough. His reply to me asking him to convince me on a date….
"Aiyah…weekend we already say wed meet for dinner liao wat….”Ladies and Gentleman….pls rate and tell me how convincing was that?
*bish*
My dear R has officially lost all spontaneity!
I was picturing some more….hmm…convincing and more sincere line??!!!??? Like….erhmm..let’s see…(it’s tuff cos I DON”T ask pple out for dates- I wait for pple to ask.LOL) Perhaps something like…
”Sorry for my blunder, but I would really like your company for dinner tonight. I’ll make it up with a nice dinner? What do u say? Yes?”- and perhaps a charming smile to go with the question?
Well…Am I asking too much? I’m dreaming already I know…entertain me yar? I know my dear R will never ever to that spontaneous or romantic to so speak….hahahahaha =p
3 more hours to my….no…not date…DINNER!=p
Recap
It’s been awhile…. Emotions have been flying all over since my grandma’s demise. The week seemed rather long. The days and night seemed to overlap each other to a point where you just don’t know which day is it and what time is it anymore.
Coming back to work on Monday was difficult. Sleep deprivation through the wake was tough. Mentally and physically drained and emails was still piling since last week. Had lots to clear and a project plan to come up with.
It’s Tuesday today, a week since it all happened. It still seemed abit unreal. I still miss her really. I wonder with her departure, when will our next family gathering be. I always enjoy gatherings at my grandma’s. With all the kids around and everybody else having a good time, it’s always enjoyable.
My grandma’s demise brought everyone together this time. Perhaps for the last, perhaps not, I’m not sure. But I can’t help feeling that it’s somehow sad to see that people it takes such sad occasion to have everyone together again. You see for so many years, I’ve never managed to catch many of my cousins with my nieces or nephews during Chinese New Year. I found that I could barely recognize them, not to even mention knowing their names.
I know the irony is that people would rather share happiness than share sadness, but in this case, I wonder if it was a good cause for a gathering to begin with. Contradicting? I know.
So, I caught up with a lot of my cousins. Some getting married, some still contented being single and some, still searching for love. Somehow we have all grown up through the years from the irritating, screeching rascals, always so noisy.....to working class adults.*tadah*
Ha! It was funny reminiscing the past when we were all carefree little rascals just trying to have a good time! We would always gather at my grandma’s at weekends, make a hell lot of noise and refusing to go home when time is up because we were all so hyped up with the company that going home was definitely not the first choice of the night. I miss those carefree days…*ahhhh…* those were the days….
*Snap*
Back to reality, we all have different paths in our lives now pursuing different goals. We exchanged thoughts about our work, the world, relationships and whatever we thought of to update each other. It was nice…..
And when we ran out of topics to burn, we actually stumbled upon blogging…sheesh…blogging is definitely the IN thing right now. Anyways, my cousins asked for my blog URL. I gave it some thoughts and decided…”Nah”. I like to write freely where I know no one would “feel” for my writing. It’s better this way. So I got their URL instead and added more blogs for my reading leisure. It’s more interesting to read than writing about my mundane life really. Muahahaha…I’m complex and boring rememember?
*bleh*
