A Tribute to my Grandma
My grandma passed away last night around 8.30pm. Or so the doctor declared…
When we finished dinner, my mum received the news that my grandma was gone. We were all shocked. I didn’t even get to see the last of her…..
When we arrived at her place, she was laid on her bed. Looking pale and frail but peaceful. It was as if she was just sleeping and having a long nice dream. My aunt told us that it was during dinner that they felt something amiss. She was not exactly eating and sweating quite profusely. Then she gave a big sigh, as thou a sigh of relief….and that was her last breathe.
Looking at her body, I could not believe that she was dead…..
My grandma was a great woman. She was a woman of great determination, intellect and character. She’s always been seemed to me as a very strong woman who will protect her family at all costs. My mum would always tell me stories of how my grandma took her stand to make sure that her family was unharmed.
As a kid, I would always be very fascinated as to why she reads the newspaper out loud, emphasizing each word (in hokkien, because she can only understand hokkien) and often a short pause between each word. When I was old enough to understand, my mum told me that she was a really enthusiastic learner. Although she had never gone to school, she learnt how to read the newspapers from her children, word by word. And the amazing thing is, she could remember them all and eventually finishing the entire newspaper. Amazing woman isn't she?
Her birthday and mine were actually 3 days apart, we were all somewhat hoping we could celebrate her 94th birthday this coming September, but….I guess her body was wearing out.
Before she suffered from Alzheimer’s disease, I used to enjoy talking to her whenever she stayed over. Once, she took out a tiny gold ring from her finger and gave it to me. I didn’t want it but she insisted I kept it. I still have it today, it’s the only memory I have of her now….
She is now re-united with my grandpa in heaven….
When my grandpa died, she was devastated, but she kept on a strong front so as to keep everybody together. My mum said she saw my grandma weeping alone at a small corner. It’s must have been hard on her….
I was really young then but I remember that my grandfather was suffering. He had lung and liver cancer, the lethal outcome of cigarettes smokes and extensive drinking. He was in bad shape and a lot of pain. Until today, I can’t forget how he looked lying in the bed. Everyone was more or less anticipating his death and was somewhat relieved when it ended. He was clearly suffering so much being alive at that point in time. Although young, I could remember clearly how my grandfather looked upon his deathbed. His condition was so bad until the doctors refuse to keep him in the hospital. They thought he was better off at home. That is why to this date, I never ever like the idea of drinking and smoking and I would never ever encourage the people whom I really care about to smoke. The pain and suffering that comes after is just too much. If not for yourself, think about those you love around you, looking at you suffering and yet they could not do anything.
Life is indeed never long enough depending on how you live you life. Life is precious as much as it is fragile. Live your life to the max but at the same time, don’t forget your loved ones by your side. You never know when is the last time you’ll ever spend time together again. Never take them for granted.
Rest in peace grandma….you will always have a place in my heart….
Random Thoughts....
My mind’s actually everywhere right now….Feeling sleepy, feeling moody and of course, feeling cold. Why do the air cons in offices always SO COLD?
$#$%&^(*()
Too much money to spare? It’s almost like a freezer in here. And when it rains, even worse, you are practically in North Pole? Geezz…
Anyways, I like rainy days. Somehow it gives me a good feeling. You know like you are all dirty after a long day and you go for a shower kind? The refreshing sort of mood? Honestly, I love the feeling of being indoors when it rains. It gives me a sense of security, like I’m all “protected” and “save” indoors. Heehee..weird I know…but it’s true! I love it even more when I am in a car and it’s pouring outside…hahahaha…yar..call me weird. I am. I never really understood why I feel the way I do, but I genuinely do love that feeling. *beams*
Well, days and weeks are passing so fast again. Looking back, I’ve theoretically been working for about a year already now. Wow…Unfortunately I hardly feel I’ve accomplished much. The only thing I think I’ve made a difference is the fact that I’m giving my parents their monthly “pocket money” instead of the other way around like before. And I’ve been paying everything myself, from transport, to phone bills, daily expensse blar blar…If that’s considered achievements, then yes..I’ve achieved something. Hur hur!
It’s not really easy now that you’re actually earning your own living and controlling your own money. Whatever that you do now affects your future ultimately. You’ll need to plan for your future one day right? I want to live comfortably when I’m old….Hurhurhur…
I’m thinking of things to do this weekend. Probably try to catch ‘The Island” and do some exercise. Getting abit fat? Hahahaha…
Ramblings...
Somehow it’s good to back home sweet home and not needing to fly in and out. Been staying in a hotel like for the past 3 months. To some, it is seen as a form of luxury , but to me, honestly, it’s really nothing much. I mean I have everything else at home, perhaps even more, except cable tv! Hahahaha…
Oh well, it is definitely good to be home! =D
I’ve been MIA for awhile. Having been blogging for a week. Been real cooped up with training and work. And since been staring the computer like for such long hours, I really don’t feel like turning my laptop on at home to blog. My eyes need some rest, moreover, I’ve been trying to finish Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince like since last Saturday? Well, still got a few more chapters to go. I’ve never had problems finishing a book, but this time round, I’m really exhausted after a day’s work. My eyes tire out very easily lately….wonder why…
Well, just some recap on my mundane happenings really…
First, last week was training for the 1st 3 days, then back to office on Thursday and was surprised at some seat arrangement changes. I’ve managed to get a beta seat…somehow…or at least I hope. Better view and perhaps a little more privacy? *shrugs* ultimately in this office. Privacy is only when you’re boss. Haha!
Oh, I’ve gotten my Aussie PR, so took half day on Friday to go down Aussie High Comm and then a short day at work afterwards. Not too happening.
On Sat, met up with some of my Aussie mates and Friday, it’s really just lazing around at home and unsuccessful attempts at finishing Harry Potter. Well, I had a nice steamboat dinner with my family tho. It was nice….the sense of home.
My dad’s going to work in Hong Kong soon, leaving in September. I’m feeling abit weird to that sudden decision. I mean…I’m really gonna miss my dad. I know this is a good opportunity for him…but at the same time I’m a lil hesitate and worried…*haiz*
I guess we’ll have to see how things go huh? In the meantime I guess I’ll have to try to spend more time with him before he leaves…sadly..he leaves before my bdae…*wails*
Bad day at work really…don’t feel like talking abt it either. But honestly, I don’t even know where to start…
Problematic me….
Ramblings...
Somehow it’s good to back home sweet home and not needing to fly in and out. Been staying in a hotel like for the past 3 months. To some, it is seen as a form of luxury , but to me, honestly, it’s really nothing much. I mean I have everything else at home, perhaps even more, except cable tv! Hahahaha…
Oh well, it is definitely good to be home! =D
I’ve been MIA for awhile. Having been blogging for a week. Been real cooped up with training and work. And since been staring the computer like for such long hours, I really don’t feel like turning my laptop on at home to blog. My eyes need some rest, moreover, I’ve been trying to finish Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince like since last Saturday? Well, still got a few more chapters to go. I’ve never had problems finishing a book, but this time round, I’m really exhausted after a day’s work. My eyes tire out very easily lately….wonder why…
Well, just some recap on my mundane happenings really…
First, last week was training for the 1st 3 days, then back to office on Thursday and was surprised at some seat arrangement changes. I’ve managed to get a beta seat…somehow…or at least I hope. Better view and perhaps a little more privacy? *shrugs* ultimately in this office. Privacy is only when you’re boss. Haha!
Oh, I’ve gotten my Aussie PR, so took half day on Friday to go down Aussie High Comm and then a short day at work afterwards. Not too happening.
On Sat, met up with some of my Aussie mates and Friday, it’s really just lazing around at home and unsuccessful attempts at finishing Harry Potter. Well, I had a nice steamboat dinner with my family tho. It was nice….the sense of home.
My dad’s going to work in Hong Kong soon, leaving in September. I’m feeling abit weird to that sudden decision. I mean…I’m really gonna miss my dad. I know this is a good opportunity for him…but at the same time I’m a lil hesitate and worried…*haiz*
I guess we’ll have to see how things go huh? In the meantime I guess I’ll have to try to spend more time with him before he leaves…sadly..he leaves before my bdae…*wails*
Bad day at work really…don’t feel like talking abt it either. But honestly, I don’t even know where to start…
Problematic me….
Back to Reality
After a long 3 months....my last day in Phil has finally materialise....
In a weird way,I'm not truly that excited as I thot I would be...Hmm..perhaps somehow I can grown some attachments to this place?
Honestly, I like it here because the living standards here are obviously much lower compared to Singapore.So in other words, I live like a Queen here.*big grin* Things are really relatively cheaper compared to Singapore, I'd really miss the shopping here....
Next week...it's back to reality....
No more van to pick us from the hotel doorstep...it's back to good ol' squeezing and shoving with everyday commuters in MRT again...Haizz...welcome back to the real world!
I'd miss the pple here too...they're really nice pple...unlike Singaporeans..sad to say...
Well...I suppose I'll end it here for now...
Till back in SG.
Whatever....
I'm a lil off balance today. Lack of sleep apparantly. Extremely long and tiring day today...and it's still only 2pm in the afternoon...
*yawnz*
It's been awhile since I've blog...I've been bz lately. My last week in Phil...Yay!!!I'm finally going to be home for good...So looking forward really...Really really stretched out!
Once I'm back will be going for another 3 days training...before finally going back to the office.
*Brain dead* Have to end here...
I want out!
My weekend really sucked!I dun even where I should start.
Well,somehow I have so many things to write, so many things to vent...but I somehow cannot put them into words...
*sigh*
Sometimes I just want out...this world has too much pain and sufferings....
I want out!
Condolences
It's really a tragic incident!
I send my condolences to those affected, their families and friends.*prayers*
It's really sad to see we(all human beings)cannot live in peace. Why do we need to resort to killing one another just so to deliver a message?
Doesn't information technology bridge a whole new world for us? Things like emails, forums, media etc etc? I'm sorry if I sound as if I'm trying to be farnie or something. But honestly, think about it! Why do we need to resort to killing innocent lives? They did nothing to harm you. There were going with their everyday lives, making their way to work on another usual day, and "BOOM", they might not even know what hit them.
Sacrificing innocent lives isn't really the best way to deliver a message....
Let's take a moment of silence to remember these innocent victims and may god bless their souls...
Sometimes I do wonder, perhaps the world needs something big, bigger than God perhaps to stop all the violence, poverty, the hungry and the hatred that we might have for each other across borders, religions, race and social chaste.
Let there be peace.....
Just Another Day
Blogging has become some sort of time-killing past time for me now…
Whenever I feel bored or having some frustrations or thoughts that I wish to get off my chest, I’d try to see if I can put them out in words….
Somehow I find myself getting less and less “interesting”. I seemed to be getting more and more pessimistic about life and definitely complaining more…Y?
It kinda sucks sometimes knowing that your life is really revolving arnd work and pretty much nothing else. It’s as if I’m in my 50s or 60s. No wait, perhaps even people of 50s or 60s have something nice to write about. Maybe about their kids, their grand kids even, assuming they have a family of course.
Ironically, I suppose to be in my early 20s. Well, I’ll be 24 in a few months time…..Still, to many others, this is suppose to be THE GOLDEN AGE?
*Sigh*
Can someone tell me why my life seems rather colorless now?
I need to find some colors somehow, perhaps I should go join some club or something…I’ve been thinking of going back to choral singing. But I think I’ve somehow lost touch…perhaps I should look for a new hobby. I’ve been thinking actually…maybe dance? Guitar? Or go back to piano lessons. Or I should just find some voluntary work to spice up my life and yet contribute to the society. I’ve always been procrastinating on this…perhaps its time I actually DO something about it before times whizzes past again.
Well, maybe once all the traveling stops and I’m back to SG for good aey? Hehehehe…excuses again perhaps? Bleh!
The Art of Blogging
Hmm….How should I start? I’ll start by saying that I am extremely, utterly and miserably bored for the past few days…..
So I’ve started browsing through all the often talked about blogs that have been mentioned in the newspapers.
It seems that these bloggers have and probably enjoying their new found fame. Hundreds of people visit their blog each day and leave a huge amount of comments varying from “I hate you comments” to “I enjoy reading your blogs” blar blar.
Somehow I feel that blogging has somehow become a fashion statement of the e-world. We write down our daily happenings, our thots, our sorrows, some fancy pictures, fancy html code, fancy fonts, colours etc. But the truth is…is this really all you? Or is it merely a mask that you put up while enjoying the fame and exposure?
I always have a knack(not sure if its good or bad) for coming up with such out of the box wateva blar blar theories, questions etc….That’s cos I’m really a problematic girl who thinks too much! Bleh!
So….let’s see, how real can we get or be in the blogging world? Does posting up pictures, comments, putting up our thoughts in flowery English make us as real as we can get? Somehow I feel that the blog world is so very different from the real world. Can you really get to know someone so honestly just by reading his/her blogs everyday? Where did all the clique of meeting up for a coffee go to? Did technology erode such habits with the introduction of online chats and online blogs. Are thoughts really beta conveyed at our comfort zone in front of the PC at home?
Words can sometimes make a lot of difference to someone, but can words truly depict your innermost self such as honesty and sincerity etc?
So what is the art of blogging? To get the most hits? To have people reference your blog URL? To be the most searched for blog in Google? To be published in papers? Or worse, to be band by Government agencies? Ha ha…I prob failed in all above for my blog…but hell..who cares!
Ultimately we all know where this leads to….. Popularity- The fight to it!
It’s just me….*shrugs*
Bits and Pieces
I'm seriously bored to pieces today. There were busy times, but it came down eventually back into browsing the internet.
I read a huge amount of materials today, from random blogs to infidelity reviews etc.(Yes, I was that bored)
Anyways, I've realised that many bloggers out there enjoying putting up pics, all their personal information from emails to mobiles and even their naked pics. Ha...yes...it's funny how people view blogs nowadays huh? It's like this sanctuary of all your personal space, except the irony that it's published on the internet where anyone anywhere can view it!LOL...
But as I've said before, it's a free world, we are entitled to do whatever we want other than crime I suppose?
The bloggers nowadays are getting younger and younger. I've even came across a blogger who is only 9. Sheeshh...
Going through their blogs make me feel old somehow, it's like they're full of energy, full of life and so bursting with energy!Mine on the other hand, is full of complains, about work and absolutely bland with no pictures...Hmmm....is that a sign that I am really getting old? To think I used to be so crazy in school...I must be getting old...I guess it's the paying price of growing up, stepping into young adulthood and coping with the working world.
Life isn't just a piece of cake after all, as much as I miss all the school days, all the school holidays, all the BGR stuffs we used to face and the young romantic love that we used to go dreamy about as young girls...I've discovered that life isn't as simple as I thought it was before. Growing up gives you more responsibilities, more committments and more things to think about that just day-dreaming away...Life is cruel I suppose...I do wish I can go back to the days of innocence and indulge myself in romantic escapades again...Haa...
Time to wake up and smell the roses....In other words..BACK TO WORK LADY!
Blog or Block?
It's farnie how some people's blog can actually be blocked...Hahaha...I mean..talk about freedom of speech and all...
I guess blogging somehow is a very personal thing. I don't know about others but I think the word "personal" here is rather relative. Finally I had a glimpse of SPG's blog today...Hahaha..well...personally, I think she can start a series of her own books similar to that of Sidney Sheldon! Sheeshh...
But seriously, one thing I admire about her is her uncanny way of expressing herself online in ways that people do not normally do. She has no qualms in admitting her preference over caucasians and have absolutely no problem sharing her fantasies or watsoever and perhaps parts of her sex life?
And....wow..she's only 19?I'm not exactly sure about that tho....
Anyways, I think her unpretentious self somehow screams out "bitch!" for some people. Personally, I'll like to neutral and say that it's her life, give her a break!
I've also visited Xiaxue's blog today, not exactly the first time but whenever I haf the time I suppose....She is another outspoken lady that somehow lands herself in position where people started sending hate mails to her...Geez...seriously..where has freedom of speak gone to?
I guess sometimes human beings enjoy the power of critique and enjoy passing comments on one another just so they feel better about themselves? I mean look at the stars themselves, every tabloid, newspapers, news etc, always enjoy having some scandalous pictures if any or some juicy news. Why?Because once you are in the limelight...people enjoy talking about you and knowing every single details about your life. Once you are in the limelight, you simply lose your privacy?
Well, ever since SPG got her blog story up in the news, it seems that pple are starting to notice her blog and some government sector has even started blocking her site...hahaha...how farnie....I doubt many pple even know my blog's existence! Not that I want to....but I guess keeping a low profile somehow is good. I do wonder, if my blog is ever ever(I noe it wun..juz an example)published or something, would my counters hit like a few million a day? And would I have the added stress to blog beta? And probably every single day to "keep up" with the times and pple?
Nah...I still like the way my blog is quite hidden now...Least I know I still have some space of my own...My freedom of speech!=D
SAP LIVE!
SAP is officially LIVE in Philippines today...
YAY!!!So far so good...Keeping our fingers crossed that no major issues will happen.
We had an interesting celebration for this event.
We're all in a SAP Loaded T-shirt with company logo as well as Keanu Reeves at the back..hahaha..was the idea of our funny German president of the Phil company. Hahah..
Taking the plane back soon...
Counting down!!!!!!
=D
