K for Komplexity...

It's a Small World

Sometimes it really does amaze me that the world is indeed so small…..

The word is, a gd gf fren of mine sent me this sms on Friday nite,

“What a small world. Remember xyz? I just saw her with (my OML)’s fren. They are actually together.”

*Note: I changed some of the names here because I do wish to be seen as infringing other’s privacy.

For those who don’t know, Miss XYZ had a dramatic exit out of my life a couple of years back. For those closer to me, you can probably already guessed who Miss XYZ is. The other heart-breaker…let’s call him Mr X then.

Yes, somehow she has unknowingly crept into my life again.

This incident has happened like 4 to 5 years back. Perhaps I am deemed petty in some ways to remember everything until today…the truth is, I’ve always kept it in a small corner of my memory, never lost but always there.

The truth is, I never really quite understood everything that happened then, it was almost like those drama series on tv…..only it was real and happened to me.

Boy hurts girl, girls cries and discover it’s her best friend that he’s shagging.

Okay, sorry, there wasn’t any shagging bits in my story. Thankfully. (Although I’m not sure if they had any, anyway….hahahaha *shrugs*)

I was very very very hurt then…..Because I was betrayed not by one but by 2 people I loved dearly then. Admittingly, I was a wreck, although I tried to keep a strong outlook. But inside me, I was really shattered!

Anyway I’m going to blog this all in past tense…..I need to remind myself again that it’s all over.

So here’s the story….

Mr X was a nice young, suave chap. I suppose many girls would queue to be his girl. I guess I never thought that sparks would fly between us….well…it did and somehow I felt rather lucky. Yes, I ACTUALLY felt lucky… sheesh….anyway….back to my story….

We had a magical start really. I remember how he got me a silver ring, slipped it on my finger when we were dancing at a school party….it was sooo romantic, so sweet….it would have been a great memory had we last…..

But alas, I guess we were never meant to me. Or perhaps I was never meant to be with a romantic guy…well..my OML is really the opposite! We din even have an anniversary!*humpft* Okay okay…digress abit…

Anyway he was a jerk really. Don’t talk about the breaking of heart and stuffs. But he was never a nice caring bf to me. Through the times we were together, he hardly sends me home. We never really went on dates either, it was usually with the gang or that he will be out with his frens. He seldom asked me along on those occasions….I did felt abit left out at times……

So our relationship was anything but exciting. Perhaps he got bored or that I couldn’t give him what he wanted…..

So here’s when Miss XYZ came into the picture….

Miss XYZ and me were good pals. We did silly things together, shared jokes together, shared tears and laughter together…..I treated her with all sincerity and confided everything to her….
What really broke my heart was when that fateful nite during a school camp……

I was feeling rather miserable and lost so I opened my heart out and confided to her….

Me: I think Mr X is seeing someone else….

Miss XYZ: Oh…no lar..don’t think so much…I don’t think so…

Me: but I can really feel it…just that I don’t know what to do or say….

…………...
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Honestly I can’t really remember the entire conversation word for word….but at the end of the day, I cannot forget the fact that she was that other women and yet I actually confided in her. How contradicting and dramatic was that?

She betrayed my trust as a friend and betrayed our friendship. I know now for sure that she did not value our friendship like I thought she did. When she saw my fren the other night, she only asked of Mr X and no mention of me at all…..That was her true self!

And Mr X’s excuse after the scandal was exposed…That we weren’t meant to be together, and he preferred the sadder and quieter me. He felt that when I had problems with my ex-boyfriend, that was the time he was attracted to me. Which is really lame and makes no sense because…honestly…who gives a lame reason like that? He prefers a sad gf? Crap!

It simply showed he did not know me as a person then…..Ironically, in truth, I was more of a introvert then extrovert. He didn’t see that neither did he know that. Interestingly, I put up a crazy front thinking he like the happy me….but I was wrong…so wrong…

Miss XYZ was the crazy sort too, so when I saw them together, I was heartbroken, shattered and totally lost it! I couldn’t comprehend what I saw…I was simply devastated…

And yet within all these mess, I was silly enough to hope for the best between them. I was wrong because Miss XYZ never treated me as a close friend. And Mr X, he was simply a jerk who dumped me perhaps I couldn’t give him what he wanted…that, however is another story…

I would never forsake a friendship in exchange for a man….but I guess our friendship was not strong in the first place. It was only a naïve part of me to think otherwise…..

I think that’s enough emotions for the day….

Here ends my story….for now….

Blabbered by KaiRiNu at 4:55 PM